In our culture we’re often told to hustle, we’re often told to work harder and longer, and we’re often told to strive for perfection. We’re sometimes told that it’s ok to make mistakes, but rarely are we told that we’re allowed to do things again.
As I write this I keep thinking back to the Maya Angelou quote that, paraphrasing, goes, You did what you knew how to do, and when you knew better, you did better. I think this can be applied to anything across the board.
I have a painting that I made about 5 years ago, for example. At the time I was happy with it because first, I had carved out some time to paint, and second, because I had used a medium I hadn’t used in a long time. At the time, this was enough. But over the past year as I’ve been looking at it hanging on my wall, I can’t help but think, I can make it better. I can do better. And do you know what, there is no one, not anyone, other than myself, that would stand in my way.
A few years ago I wrote a novella. At the time I was proud of myself because I had made the time despite working full-time and raising kids to get that done. I was proud of myself for it being the most words I had ever strung together into a story to date. I was proud of myself for self-publishing it despite pandemic shut downs and stress and homeschooling and losing my job. I was proud of myself just for getting it done. More recently I’ve thought, I can make it better. Sure, I self-published it. Sure, people have already read it, judged it, and placed an opinion on it. Sure, it may mean swallowing my pride, but I can still do it. I can still make it better. I’ve learned some things along the way, I’ve had some ideas. Why not try?
While I see there is merit in putting your best foot forward, and while I see that giving the best of yourself leaves the most lasting impression, ‘the best of ourselves’ is relative to where we are in our lives. And sometimes our best is less than perfect. I would rather keep trying, imperfectly, than not try at all out of fear of making a mistake.
This is the way that I have done life. Messily. Trying and failing and trying again. Learning, growing, rising, falling. Some of my failures have been public, some have been private, but every time I fail I think, now I get to do it again. I get to try over. I get to make it better. Every time, I do it again.
The message that I have is simply this: Don’t not do things for fear that they won’t be perfect. Don’t not showcase your efforts for fear they aren’t good enough. If it was the best you knew how to do, on that day of your life, then it was as perfect as it could be. And when, down the line, a time comes when you think to yourself, Hmm, I could do it better now, then, do it again. It’s ok. No one will stop you but you.
-mtg
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